Quoteboard

"All tears are the same" - Irish saying "So little time. So little to do." - Oscar Levant "The main obligation is to amuse yourself." - S.J.Perelman "Be careful who you befriend. They will eventually ask you for something." - George Carlin "I wasted time and now doth time waste me." - William Shake-something "excessive consumption may produce a laxative effect" - box of low-carb jelly beans "Banquets available (min 2 people) " - found on Thai restaurant menu "People are like rivers, it takes significant events and time to get them to change their course." - anonymous "Each time a patriot missile is shot down an angel gets its wings" - anonymous "That's a bad idea whose time has come" - anonymous "[that's like a] black person whose best friend is a blind white person who hates blacks" - Dan Savage on gay men seeking "straight acting" men. "Your first day is the worst and all the rest are the same." - anonymous "There's always a new mistake to be made." - anonymous "Regulation represents the public's ability to require corporate practice to be transparent, honest, and accountable." - anonymous "There is no limit to what a person may accomplish so long as they don't need the credit" - anonymous "Sex is nature's joke on men, love is nature's joke on women." - JFK "Every time a friend succeeds I die a little bit." - Gore Vidal "there's lots not to do" - Laura Perrin, the last days of Z.com "We judge others by their actions, we judge ourselves by our intentions" - anonymous (perhaps my favorite quote of all time) "If want a thing done give it to a busy person" - anonymous "you know, the fish equivalent of hummingbirds... ummmm... oh, seahorses!" - nice, but odd guy sitting next to me on the Gold Line "If I've seen further than others, it is because I have stood on the sholders of giants." - Isaac Newton "When Jesus said love your enemies he probably meant 'don't kill them'" - bumper sticker "Faith is believing in something when common sense tells you not to." - Susan Walker (Natalie Wood), Miracle on 34th Street (1947) "I sent the club a wire stating, Please accept my resignation. I don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member." - Groucho Marx "Marriage is the chief cause of divorce." - Groucho Marx "Worry is interest paid in advance on a loan that never comes due." - anonymous "The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing... if you can fake that, you've got it made." - Groucho Marx "Jesus, where will it end? How low do you have to stoop in this country to become president?" - Hunter S. Thompson "[it's like] falling down an elevator shaft and landing in a pool of mermaids" - Hunter S. Thompson on the success of gonzo journalism "The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple." - Oscar Wilde "First get your facts; then you can distort them at your leisure." - Mark Twain "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damn lies, and statistics." - Benjamin Disraeli "Then there was the man who drowned crossing a stream with an average depth of six inches." - W. I. E. Gates